in limbo

As most of you know by now, our family was evacuated on Wednesday, at 4:30 AM due to the Eaton fire in Altadena, the community next door to ours.  We have been staying in Orange County ever since, first with our son and his family and then in a hotel.  With school cancelled through today, and the threat of another wind event, we have felt caught in a perpetual state of limbo.  We knew that we had a home to go back to, but we didn’t know when was the right time to go back.  The one thing we didn’t want to do was take Ben and Meredith’s little guys back, only to have the power go out or be evacuated in the middle of the night again.  The 5, 8 and 10 year-olds were aware of the fires and had lots of questions.  But they were able to experience it as a bonus vacation.

Our daughter Meredith called it the worst kind of “Choose Your Own Adventure.”  Every day we would have to plan for the days ahead, with absolutely no idea of all the factors that might impact that decision.  We know so many people who have lost so much more, and that weighs on us too.  There is a survivors’ guilt that we will be able to pick up our lives when others will not.  

In the Sermon on the Mount, Jesus said, “Do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself.  Each day has enough trouble of its own.”  (Matthew 6:34) This is the way we are meant to live, trusting for each day’s provision of “daily bread”.  It is at moments like this that our faith in that provision is tested, and our often-suppressed worries bubble up to the surface.  It is a reminder that we are always in God’s hands, and all our efforts to control the winds of change are in vain.  Oh, but we want to! 

Thank you for all of your prayers.  We will be all right.  We will find ways to join with others in our communities to take care of our neighbors.  We are so immensely grateful for the firefighters and all those who stand guard for our welfare.  We are happy to head home.  We are blessed.

Love, Liz

Photo of water tenders in position on the ridge above our home on January 13, 2025.